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February 8, 2010

Bleurgh.

I need to pull my socks up. This degree isn’t going well, and as if I don’t work hard enough anyway? What am I doing wrong? I’m flowcharting a lot, to work out what and where to improve. Maybe it’s because I’m feeling more able to work, everything opens up and I have to wonder what to do and when. Reading, vocab and improving writing and grammar. But time, and keeping it up over time is the hard thing. To keep up the motivation that I failed that exam so need to work harder and to do better to do well. It’s just keeping this up. I’m really tired. I had no Christmas, I had no break, and now this, now having to keep it all up and work even harder? I want to do this, but ach, seriously, I have done nothing but work since the middle of November. I need a break at some point, surely?!

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. February 9, 2010 12:26 am

    It does sound like you need a break. Could you decide to take a weekend off, go somewhere and not (try) not to think about the work? Difficult to do I know, but maybe worth trying at least?

    Are you registered with your university’s disability office, just wondered since you’d be entitled. I got a study coach through mine, which I found immensely useful for working out what to do and when, as well as encouraging me to take a break now and then, before inspiring me to pick up a textbook again…

    Anyway, I hope you find a balance.

    Take care,
    Differently

    • February 11, 2010 4:39 pm

      Well, I’ve picked up a leaflet… That can be enough for now! I’ve taken it easy the last few days, and will try to rest over the weekend too.

  2. findingmecrazy permalink
    February 10, 2010 12:26 am

    I’m with differently, I also think you really need a break. It sounds like you’re working yourself into the ground and it won’t help. You need to ease up on yourself, believe me I know how difficult it is (please don’t think me patronising), recently I’ve been easing up on myself and it’s not easy.
    Is there anyone at your university you could talk to? Maybe some kind of support worker? I get work support through my uni’s disability services but I know some unis don’t have great ones and some people hate using them.
    How bad are things really with your uni work? Are you striving for unattainable perfection, or does your effort just never seem to pay off?
    All of this however as I’m sure you know won’t help your mood, won’t help your mental health etc, you need to take care of yourself. Sorry this really long and rambling, I just want you to take a break, take a breather. Think about it x

    • February 11, 2010 4:41 pm

      Well I got 31% in my exam, so it is rather bad… and it doesn’t seem to pay off, no. Thanks x

      • findingmecrazy permalink
        February 12, 2010 12:28 am

        I’m sorry, that must be really upsetting obviously, sorry if I sounded patronising or anything before. Have you talked to any of the lecturers for that module about your results? x

      • February 12, 2010 4:21 pm

        Well I’ve seen the paper, I know what went wrong and will be clarifying some odd bobs!

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