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May 21, 2009

How useless was today?

I think we can say very.

And that’s only about my meeting with ED:IT. So… what now?

First of all, there was an issue with signing in. I got there 15 mins before my appointment time and waited 10 minutes to see the receptionist. I told her my name and who I was there to see, and she looked at me very confusedly, and said that there wasn’t anyone by that name there. I told her it was from the ED:IT team and she looked even more confused and asked to see my letter. I gave her the letter and she said that I must be in the wrong place. I said no, and showed her the map and the instructions to go there! She then phoned just about everyone possible to ask if they knew anyone with that name, and they didn’t. However, she didn’t think of phoning ED:IT. 20 minutes later (and I’m actually being serious, she was trying to work out what to do for so long) she decided to ring ED:IT. They must also have been confused and she ended up repeating my name endlessly, and then I heard her read my letter out. Something must finally have clicked and the person on the other end of the phone said they were on their way. Anyway, it gets to half past 1, half an hour after the appointment was supposed to start, and 2 people run in, being the people I was meant to be seeing.

After talking to them for an hour and a half, they then decided that I wasn’t at ultra- high risk of developing psychosis, and although I have experienced Psychotic symptoms in the past, they were stress related. Basically, I didn’t fit their criteria; I could have said that before I even went to the appointment (and I did, at length!) but Mr Psychiatrist heard the word Psychosis and bang, his mind was made up. So he’s the one I’m wanting to stab/kill. A lot. The lady from ED:IT is apparently going to put a referral into the CMHT for Psychology, and then hopefully the waiting list can go down over the summer.

My plan? The CBT person I’m seeing at the moment might be the way forward I feel; I’m getting somewhere with her and I like her, so surely that’s good? Obviously we’ll have to see what happens, and see what she says. If I can’t I’m slightly screwed.

They didn’t deny I needed help, infact they told me that I need support. Just, well, it’s alright them saying that but there’s a bit of a weak link in the chain…

AAAARGH.

I’m quite angry, and I feel rightly so.

In other news, I need to work out what I’m going to do over the summer, support wise. I can’t help but feel it isn’t going to work, the whole no doctor, no support thing for just over 3 months. Yet another thing to mull over.

Can today just restart, please?

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. May 22, 2009 11:07 am

    Yes, the significant thing in all of this is that you like your CBT person and you feel you’re getting somewhere with her.

    Being messed around the way you were by the psychiatrist and the early detection brigade is just business as usual in the NHS. Making a formal complaint can have useful results, though. It gives you something other than stab/kill to do with your anger, and it makes NHS staff think twice about messing you around the next time. Just a thought.

    I don’t understand why you have to face three months in a vacuum over the summer. Your GP, psychiatrist et al. need to address that. Are they all aware of the issue?

    • May 22, 2009 1:51 pm

      I’m going to bring it up with my doctor on Tuesday, when I see her. I have thought of a few options myself, but I need to investigate them further etc. I think they are vaguely aware of this, but haven’t really done anything about it. I see my Psychiatrist some time in July, and that’s it. He’s considering discharging me next time, anyway.

      The only problem I can forsee with my CBT person is her boss is informed of the change and goes NOOO but well, we’ll see what happens; no point pre-empting things!

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